I Know
by Mysteriol
Summary: You think I don’t know why you rejoined us as the Blitzkrieg Boys, that I have no idea you were merely using us when I accepted you back onto the team. But you’re wrong, Kai. [ONESHOT, Tala’s POV]


I Know 

-Tala's POV

-takes place in season 3, after Tala's match with Daichi and Kenny

_A/N: _

_Oh my god. Words cannot describe how I felt when I watched Beyblade G Revolution showing on the Singapore screen here. It was spectacular and out-of-the-world, and I nearly hyperventilated watching Tala Ivanov fight. But when I watched the entire episode, it left me thinking really deep of the numerous scenes where Tala and Kai communicated. When Tala fought, and Kai watched, there was something in our favorite wolf's eyes that was hard to apprehend, and when he lost, and Kai walked away from the sideline, I was just wondering if Tala knew Kai's real motive in joining the Blitzkrieg Boys, because he certainly looked like it._

_And it struck me how Tala looked guilty, well - to ME in my regards, and so here is MY intepretation of how he felt after fighting Daichi and Kenny in the episode, Picking Up The Pieces. _

_Once again, this is very much my own intepretation, and credits goes out to AngelhearteD for building the foundation of several of the childhood saga between Kai and Tala. Lovingly dedicated to my heroes, AngelhearteD, carzla and chibi-lothlen. My fetish for Kai and Tala would never have spurred me on to where I am today if you guys were non-existent. Cheers!_

_mysterio000_

You don't know what I know, or maybe you do, but you just pretend that I'm not aware of it. Or really, you are clueless about the minute details that I have learnt and noticed in this duration. You may be smart, Kai, but I'm Tala, and Tala Ivanov isn't as dense or as slow as the Tala of the Demolition Boys. This Tala has grown, well beyond the process of maturation and knowledge. I'm smarter now, and I know a lot more about you when you think I don't.

Even though nine years apart since the last time we were friends sure did erased the heck out of everything in between.

When I offered you my hand, and welcomed you back onto my team, did you really think I didn't know your true motive behind it? Your intention was too easy to tell. The Kai Hiwatari I know is cocky, overly arrogant, and too much egoistical to come back to the team he was deemed as a traitor and asked for re-acceptance again. For a while back then, I wanted to contemplate on how nice the notion would be to have you back on to my team. I even foolishly held hopes that you were really back, that there was this chance we could be back like how we were nine years ago.

But then again, reality is harsh like it always is, and it didn't take a blind man nor a fool to learn that you joined us to use us as nothing more than a tool to get you to your goal known as Tyson Granger. Spencer and Bryan were less skeptical, and even being cynical and doubtful like they should be, eventually believed your pretense that you really were back on our team, fighting for us, for Russia, for our victory. I even caught Bryan - Bryan of all people - giving you the hint of a prideful smile back a few days ago.

But then, they are wrong. You fooled them well, Kai, but not me. Never me. I had known you since forever, since back when we were still in the dingy, stupid abbey rotting in their torture chambers with the Balkov guards, and I have well learnt all of your devised tricks. You can't fool me, Kai.

You only want to pit yourself against Tyson. I've seen your hunger for this longed sought-for battle, just like today, when he disappeared without a trace abruptly, and that Daichi kid replaced him. When you launched your blade out of the beydish on purpose to lose, did you really think I'd be in shock like Bryan and Spencer? You probably thought I had my mouth to the floor, reeling from dreaded surprise from what you did, but I had actually expected it; foreseen the circumstances to come. I had even prepared myself, gearing for the next round to place the Blitzkrieg Boys back into a drawn match.

I asked you what happen. You didn't say much. You said with that trademark 'hn'of yours that it's up to me to win for the Blitzkrieg Boys. That I'd surely emerge triumphant over that Kenny boy. I shrugged it off coolly earlier on, but perhaps you didn't know how I really felt inside.

When you said that, I actually felt something I had never experienced for the sixteen years in my life. It overwhelmed my soul like some foreign emotions ready to plummel my heart anytime, but it was just there, and I could do naught to eliminate it. You name it - pressure, stress, the sudden weight placed upon my shoulders to win.

And what scares me is the thought drifting through my head, knowing that I have to win not only to have the Blitzkrieg Boys safe into the next round, but also to win because _you _needed the victory.

I asked myself what I was actually thinking.

Is Tala Ivanov really feeling the pressure to win, because he wants to actually _help _Kai Hiwatari satiate his powered greed of beating Tyson in the finals one day?

I didn't want to think too much about it back then, but when I sat down on the sidelines to contemplate on the prospect of it, I realized how real it was becoming, that I was actually wanting to help you, Kai. I must be out of my mind. You aren't even my friend, we stopped being friends since the day you walked out of the abbey, walked out on me with the ends of your trailing scarf coolly brushing my face. Right now, even when we are teammates, we don't even talk comfortably with each other. It's either you're sneering sarcastically at me, or I'm hurling abusive, scoffing criticisms at you.

We're like this pair of complete strangers that throw the stupidest remarks at each other now. We're not even friends. And it drives me crazy when I'm forced to face the question of why I actually am feeling like this.

I lost to Daichi for the tiebreaker round, and I felt like shit.

Maybe it was because I knew that we as the Blitzkrieg Boys would have to fight much harder to get ourselves to the next round, maybe it was because it was humiliating to lose to a two-feet elf that dwarfs by my side, but who am I kidding? I had looked at you then - you were seated at the bench, your legs crossed, your hands folded across your chest in a taut manner.

You looked…angry.

Like I had failed _you. _Like I had failed to help you achieve your next step to reach your goal. Like I had ruined much of your chances to beat Tyson one day in the tournament.

And I had all the sanity but to utter your name, "Kai…" and wonder what the heck was I doing wrong. What the heck I was really doing. Why the hell I was feeling that much stress and stupidity from this loss.

…Maybe it was because I knew how much winning this match meant to you. How much you needed this match to get you nearer to your dream, and I how I had failed.

It makes me really ponder, Kai. After having known your devious motive to join us, that you really are using the Blitzkrieg Boys to pit you against Tyson one day, why do I feel obligated to help you? Like this is my duty? And why is it that when I lost, I actually don't feel sorry for Bryan and Spencer, but for you?

Stupid. Bloody stupid, Tala. This guy is absolutely being a crystal-clear traitor in your team, and instead of disposing him, which you totally are capable of, you want to _help _him.

It makes me teeter on the brink of insanity when I wonder why on earth I am actually doing that. You are no longer my friend, Kai, and you are less than a stranger to me than a teammate. Our only common topic now is discussing strategies, and maybe how childish Tyson and Daichi can be all times.

Hn. You said I was pathetic out there with Kenny. You're probably right. I'm pathetic. Pathetically helping you when I know I shouldn't. You're hungry-mad. You're powered by greed. You're no longer that young Kai I knew in the abbey, the one who came to my rescue when the guards locked me up in the cylinder, preparing to inject crazy sedatives into my arm.

…

Who am I kidding.

I'm in denial, aren't I? Hn, laugh all you want, conscience. I may be the most egoistical and arrogant person in the world, but I still know myself better than any other mortals out there.

The reason I'm helping you…probably is because, maybe I'm still actually _hoping _that you'd turn around, and acknowledge me as your friend again.

Like that's possible. The way things are going now, it'll take the burst of another cosmic universe and the next big bang before you and I will go back to how we used to be. Maybe all I do now is yell my head off at you and abuse you with my arrogant remarks, but deep down inside, something inside tells me that you've never stop being my friend, that I've never stop respecting you and honoring the friendship we once had long, long time ago.

Even if things weren't the way it used to be. Even if you don't treat me any better now than how you treat a single piece of junk along the street. Even if you'd probably rescue your Bladebreaker friends from drowning in the sea than you will to me. Even if you'd probably give me the cold shoulder and brush me off for the rest of your life. Even if you act like you've forgotten all that childhood memories we have had nine years ago.

But I never did, and my ego will probably never allow this, but I still regard you as my _friend. _A teammate, yes, a fellow countrymen, yes. But always a friend.

I lost today, to Daichi of all people, and would have probably cost you your chances fighting with Tyson someday.

But Wolborg is still with me, and I'm still here. And while I'm standing, I'm assuring you this, Kai Hiwatari, that my beyblade can still spin and win, and so can I.

For your dream, for you. I'd pretend I still don't know your true motives, that I'm still deluded into thinking you're really fighting for us. I'd pretend you really want to do your best for Russia, and not for some stupid reason like challenging Tyson.

Just because we were once friends, and deep down inside somewhere, I know you still _are _my friend, even though I had probably stopped being one to you since the day you left me behind in the abbey.

"_We're going to stick together no matter what that bastard Boris does to us, Kai."_

"_Why?" _

"_What why? You stupid idiot. Friends stick together till eternity, don't they?"_

"_We'll be friends forever, Tala."_

And you'd better hold on to your words, Kai, you'd better.

**Owari **

_A/N: fully aware of Tala's OOCness in here, because it is slightly…farfetched to see him reacting towards such an incident in such a thoughtful manner. But erh…let's just say he's thinking really deep at this time. Heh. _

_And yes, every event mentioned about the match follows the actual storyline faithfully, because I feel that you guys out there who doesn't have Beyblade G Revolution showing your country will feel good in knowing what really went on at this time. Aren't I the best huh!_

_Cheers, and review!_

_mysterio000_


End file.
